I’ve always been independent and don’t want to rely on others, so I want to be sure my future is planned and I’m not a burden on my kids. How can I do this?
No one can predict the future, but ongoing research on healthy aging suggests ‘tipping points’ that might predict challenges and how to prepare for them, such as:
- Death of a spouse
- Serious illness of self or spouse
- Diagnosis of / exacerbation of a chronic or terminal illness
- Loss of driver’s licence, especially in suburbs or rural areas
- Loss of key supports such as a family doctor
A tipping point may invoke change – but what kind of change? Often a change is reactive, made under duress or in haste, and may not be appropriate or effective.
Making your Plans
Like all well-run projects, planning your eldercare journey requires research. Knowledge is power! What are your options for support, housing and care? What are the costs? Where might these services be obtained? Are there waiting lists and if so, how can you be added?
Here are some suggestions for these tipping-point dilemmas:
- For illness and death, support groups are available on what to expect regarding each type of illness, for palliative care and bereavement. It’s important to know you are not alone in this.
- Consult foundations and association websites for a chronic or terminal illness to learn and share coping strategies.
- Research transportation options such as Wheeltrans, volunteer drivers, Uber-type driving services, opening an account with a cab company and car-pooling. Try scheduling outings and appointments for consistent times to make it easier to arrange transportation.
- Ideally, a retiring doctor will give sufficient notice and try to recruit a new doctor or refer you elsewhere. However given the doctor shortage in Ontario, this may not be feasible. Visit Ontario’s website https://www.ontario.ca/page/find-family-doctor-or-nurse-practitioner for options and advice.
Writing it Down
No doubt you’ve made your Will and that’s great– but what about while you’re still alive?? Your wishes and preferences must be documented in your Power of Attorney for Care document, which may include a ‘living will’ about what housing and medical treatment you do, and do not, wish to receive now, and in the event you are physically or mentally incompetent. Most important is appointing a person to be your Power of Attorney for Care and carry out the instructions in the Power of Attorney for Care document. Consult your lawyer and view the information provided by the Ontario government website about Powers of Attorney for both Care and Property at https://www.ontario.ca/page/make-power-attorney, which provides an excellent overview of the process.
Clearing the Path
Make your family and advisers such as bankers, financial managers, accountants and lawyers aware of the location of your Will and Power of Attorney documents; your lawyer should have a copy. Remember that no one needs to know a Will’s contents, but they should know its location. Your doctor should also be aware of your Power of Attorney for Care – who the appointed person is and the wishes it documents – for example, ‘full code (send me to hospital) or ‘comfort measures only’ (no heroic measures). Your family, caregivers and medical team will appreciate your clear instructions.
Congratulations on taking a realistic view and making some responsible plans for a long and healthy future!
Living Your Best Retirement Lifestyle
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